Well if there's a week that ever flew by, it would be the one that just passed. Oddly enough it also seems like it lasted forever. Possibly because I did so much and kept so busy. Yesterday I found myself completely exhausted after clinic. I even went to bed before 9 and missed the second half of the hockey game :(
On saturday, I had a mid term in spinal treatment which I felt went quite well. The night before, I set up the most awesome study environment and I am not too sure if that had something to do with how I did on my midterm. Being no one was home, I studied in the living room with all the candels lit, a fire in the fireplace, a pot of tea and popcorn/dinner by my side. I also put on some very pretty music. It was like I was romancing myself :) well minus the spinal treatment notes and books that were strewn about. Perhaps the calmness of studying followed me into my exam. Anyways it was awesome and I acutally enjoyed studying (eventhough I discovered that there were "changes" to most of the speical tests that we learnt).
Outreach at Insite was during the afternoon. This is a detox center downtown and it's the first stage of detox, unlike Aurora. We walked there from school and to get to it, we had to walk though some pretty interesting areas... let me just say I wouldn't walk it alone. This place happens to be less then a block away from Main and Hastings. I wondered why they would have a detox center that is right in the middle of it all. I can kinda see how it makes sense... yet I can't. You'd think you'd want them somewhere where they can't see the back alley where people shooting up from their balcony. Anyways I didn't have much time to think because I soon entered this building and was met by smells, sights and a feeling that I hadn't really felt before. It didn't smell bad, it smelt rather sterile yet there was a smell of cigarette smoke in there too. Many people there looked like street people yet some of them had a brightness in their eyes... actually that might not be the best way to describe it cuz they still kinda looked out of it but you could feel this sense of hope and strength.
I set up my chair half spaced out because so much was going through my mind. The treatments went verry well, everyone was so greatful. Being we treated in the common room, we were able to observe other people. At one point I was so overwhelmed by emotions that I almost felt like I had to stop. Fortunately I was able to regain my strength and continue. The people I worked on were very open and talked about what they'd gone through. Because of what I've gone though with my past, I have an idea of what they talk about. Also some of the people that I've cared about in the past may have gone down this road.
There were three things that really struck me. This one guy looked strangely familiar, his tattoo was an original one and I don't know of too many people who have the same. Could it be a guy I knew from highschool? I don't know. Nor did I ask. I don't believe it was apropriate. I am just so greatful to see these people in an environment where they are getting help and taking care of themselves. An other thing that struck me was when I was looking over this client's chart and I saw 1985 as her birth year. A lump formed in my throat and I lost my breath for a while. This girl was my age. There was also a time where a young man used the phone to call and speak to his children.
After clinic, Annette asked me what I thought of that outreach. I was still internalizing it. I still am. I enjoyed it, I think. It definitely wasn't a negative experience however so much was different and emotional that it's hard to shape what I feel about the whole experience. Would I do it again? Of course I would. Like the women in Aurora, these people have amazing strength and are very admirable.